Top 10 Worst Nightmares Of A Southerner

10. Grits banned by the FDA.

 9. Waffle House changes name to House of Bagels.

 8. Boss says company is relocating to Newark.

 7. Barbeque sauce found to cause cancer in white rats.

 6. MARTA train you're riding hits wormhole, emerges in the Bronx.

 5. SUNY-Birmingham (State University of New York at Birmingham).

 4. Jack Daniels distillery destroyed by fire.

 3. Pace builds picante sauce factory in New York City.

 2. _President_ Farrakhan

 1. A yankee driving South in a U-Haul truck.